The last few days I have really been struggling with obedience and self-control. Praise God that the Spirit sanctifies every area of our flesh, working out each impurity and dark spot! It's been an interesting thread through my study time this week (and it's barely Wednesday!) Beginning with Sunday, I got to teach the last chapter for our home group from John MacArthur's Twelve Ordinary Men. Predictably, the last chapter is Judas, the wretch of a human or maybe just human. As I look back over my notes even now, I am overwhelmed at God's timing and mercy. How kind is our heavenly Father! How kind, that unbeknownst to me, he would prepare me for this week with the ultimate story of self-control and obedience. Lord, let it pour into my soul even now.
With that said, I'll begin with my notes on Judas from Sunday and finish with this morning's quiet time.
Right out of the gate, MacArthur starts this chapter with "He is the most colossal failure in all human history." This statement gave me pause, Really? All of human history? I'm glad to know it's him and not me, because last week I felt sure it was me. This is sarcasm. I don't know an emoticon for that. Was his sin so terrible on it's own or was it so terrible because it's victim was the innocent Christ?
Judas stands as a warning about the evil potential of spiritual carelessness, squandered opportunity, sinful lusts, and hardness of the heart. If you are like me, you are more concerned with how he became such a colossal failure so as to avoid this path myself. In a nutshell, here it is:
1. He didn't have authentic relationships with other believers. Anyone can have relationships and maybe even with other Christians. But if they are the kind where your dressed up, cleaned up, church self shares polite salutations with someone else's dressed up, cleaned up, church self......it is meaningless. There is a reason God's word encourages us to engage with the body of believers. IT'S BECAUSE IT'S GOOD FOR YOU!!!! It may be exhausting and painful at times, but ultimately it's for your good. It edifies and encourages you, it divides your burdens, it gives opportunity for accountability and loving rebuke. Iron sharpens iron and it does it by being authentic and transparent about who you are in Christ. It's capable of acknowledging jerkness and repenting, forgiving and moving on, helping others not to stumble wither by their own weakness or yours. Judas, was with the group of twelve, but not in the group of twelve. He was from a different town, different family and didn't have a prior relationship with any of the other disciples. Now, we've all be there and that wasn't the problem so much as it was that he never moved beyond being a stranger. Many times in scripture the disciples are listed in pairs, either by relationship (James and John), occupation, or proximity to Jesus. John the beloved goes with Jesus, the others have their buddy and then there's Judas. His anonymity, in plain sight, allowed lies and resentment to go unchecked in his cold, dark heart. Sound familiar?
2. He was so blinded by resentment and disappointment about his circumstance that he missed seeing Christ for who He was. Judas, like many Jews, wanted the Messiah to return in glory, to right the wrongs done to Jews, rebuild the temple and set up His kingdom. Again, this was not the main problem. Even other disciples had similar hopes, but at some point they realized this wasn't the Messiah they got, but they built a bridge......and got over it. They realized he was so much more, that it wasn't about an earthly kingdom but a place prepared for them with the Father......for eternity. Not Judas, he couldn't get over the selfishness and pride that he was hoping to indulge when he got his dues, when he got his power and privilege that would surely come with being a faithful follower of the Messiah. But, the dues never came, the power never came. Following the Messiah was about serving humbly, dying to your own desires, taking up your own cross and walking away from everything the world had to offer. He was never really drawn to the person of Christ, He was the means to an end. And there, the resentment began. Resentment that would cost him valuable time with His Savior and eternity with His Father. He was so blinded about what he wasn't getting right this minute, that he missed the "riches" he could have actually held onto. The riches you don't hold in your hands. Anyone?
3. He used his false servitude and false obedience to excuse himself from self-examination and more importantly, the conviction of the Holy Spirit. He never had an ounce of true love for Christ. His heart had never been changed, and therefore the light of truth only hardened him. Remember, Judas was there for every miracle, every sermon and every prayer. He was an eyewitness to the saving knowledge of Christ and yet never let it wash over him. Judas listened to every parable, every teaching unmoved and never applied the lessons. He was a master of deceit. Can you imagine being with Jesus and seeing someone healed or even Lazarus raised from the dead? And while you feign rejoicing or praise, your heart whispers "I hate Him. I hate who He is and who I'm not." "I deserve more, I deserve better." Oh friends, see yourself for who and what all of us are. Filthy rags. None deserving anything. Our hypocrisy hides nothing from the Holy Spirit, haven't you heard.....He's taken up residence, in you. He sees every blemish we try to cover, hears every angry word our heart speaks. And yet, He loves us. He died for us, knowing all of this. Knowing we are all capable of the sins of Judas. I am. Are you?
And finally, most importantly.......
4. He didn't have an authentic relationship with Christ. When Jesus revealed that one of them would betray Him, no one suspected Judas. Judas had so mastered his deceit and hypocrisy that it didn't even occur to them that he could betray Christ. But, it occurred to Christ alright. For three years, Christ knew every word out of Judas' lying lips was bathed in hatred. He knew every offer of help or friendship, every prayer or "Amen" was given to conceal his true heart. As I think about it now, is it possible that none suspected Judas, not because of his skillful deceit, but because Christ consistently showed him such genuine love and kindness? Hmmmmm. What if none suspected Judas because Christ never treated him any differently or loved him any less? Hello, obedience and self-control, welcome to our story!
Now really y'all, we all know we have avoided entire cities on the map because so and so may still live there and we may still be mad at them. But my word, as though the life and ministry of Christ weren't difficult enough! To have to endure it with a person who you know loathes and hates everything about you right at your side? And, not only that, you wash their feet! You calm their storms, you are their provision, you pour yourself into them, knowing they are set on a fixed course that will end in your death. And you love them anyway. Jesus kept hinting to the disciples about a "devil" among them and His impending death and betrayal, not to be mysterious or coy but, because He TRULY loved Judas and was trying to give him as many chances for redemption as He could. Oh Lord! That you show each of us that love!
Surely, I can love my "neighbor" who mildly annoys me! So, that was the seed planted Sunday. I promise it will make sense after coffee and the next post.
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